I like to keep this blog balanced. I write about my success with girls. But I’m also candid about my failures.
Because here’s the truth about womanizing:
To have sex with many women, you must learn to deal with lots of rejection.
Yeah, OK, so I probably get laid slightly more than the average man.
But I also endure a never-ending stream of female rejection.
Now I’m not complaining or asking for your sympathy. I chose this path. So I accept the consequences – good and bad. And one silver lining?
I’ve learned about the nature of rejection – and how to handle it.
First of all, it’s true that the pain of rejection dulls over time as you get older and more experienced. But I don’t think it ever entirely goes away. So a normal man has to find a way to deal with it, mentally, if he’s gonna face it regularly. He needs a way to toughen his mind or else he might go nuts! There are several ways to mute the pain besides getting older:
- Inner Game – strong inner game is part of it. Women should ideally have zero effect your self-esteem or sense of self-worth. So you shouldn’t get too upset over any one ‘no.’
- Backup Girls – having a harem also helps. Rejection stings less when you’re not hungry for sex or starved for female affection.
- Not Looking For Validation – not basing your existence around girls is vital. You’ve simply gotta have more important things going on in your life. ‘Success’ with women cannot be your primary source of validation.
But even when you’ve got those things locked down? Sometimes you’re still gonna think about certain harsh past rejections. Or you may ponder the possibility of a potential upcoming rejection – usually from a girl you actually like.
But there are different ways to think about it.
You can be obsessive, emotional and reactive.
Or you can be objective, analytical and logical.
Learn to play the odds of rejection in your head.
By doing this you’re essentially turning the probability of a rejection into a pure numbers game and removing emotion. Like an old gambler betting on a horse race – where it’s his thousandth bet and he doesn’t need the money.
But first off you gotta understand that not all rejections are the same. There are different types, at all different stages of the game.
For example say a girl swipes left on your Tinder profile. Or you approach a girl on the street, and she refuses to give you her number, when you ask for it. Now in those cases you already lost. There are no numbers to play. Your ‘odds’ of rejection are 100%.
But now let’s look at a different, more ambiguous, example…
Say you’re an older guy (40+) and you go on a first date with a pretty 23-year-old girl, who you approached at a coffee shop several days ago. The date goes well. You have a few mojitos at a Cuban bar and then end up back at your apartment.
You have a hot make out session. Maybe suck on her tits and even finger her pussy a for little while. She dry humps you for a bit, with clothing on, like you’re back in high school. But she won’t get naked. And she won’t fuck your, or suck your dick, or even give you a decent hand job. After about an hour at your place she goes home.
She doesn’t text you afterwards or the next day.
Now let’s say that you actually liked this girl.
So you may find yourself thinking about her the next morning:
- Will I see her again?
- Is there still a chance we’re gonna have sex?
- Or is she gonna ghost on me?
First factor in everything from your interaction:
- You got the number via day game (she liked you enough to give it to you)
- She was responsive via texting before first date
- She arrived on time
- Good chemistry
- Passionate French-kissing
- She seemed comfortable with your touch, she touched you back
- She went home with you
- Touched her bare pussy (only for about three minutes)
- Sucked on her tits (only for about two minutes)
- Dry humping
- She’s young
- She had one small tattoo (slut tell)
- Sex talk
- She’s dated older men and seemed disgusted by men her age
- She didn’t ask you many personal questions
- No attempt to hold your arm or hand on walk from bar to apartment
- She didn’t fuck you
- Didn’t even touch your penis
- No text after the first date
- She lives far away (more than 10 miles away)
So what are your odds?
Here’s how I’d figure it:
- 50% Chance You Hear From Her, But Never See Her Again
- 30% Chance She Ghosts (never hear from or see her again)
- 20% Chance Of Having Sex (sometime in the next 48 hours)
Past experiences are also useful reference points:
- How did this date compare to other successful or failed first dates?
- What other girls have you dated that were similar to this girl?
- How did those relationships/interactions turn out?
All of these things are factored in. Randomness and erratic female behavior are also part of it, because you just never know with women, they’re chaotic. And of course the numbers are always changing based on her actions.
So say after calculated the odds in your head from the first date above, this girl texted you late the next day, a full 24 hours after the first date. She asks if you liked going out with her. What you thought about her. But she won’t schedule another date, she refuses requests to set specific day and time.
The odds change:
- 87% Chance You Will Never See Her Again (regardless of future text contact)
- 13% Chance Of Having Sex (sometime in the next 48 hours)
48 hours later you still haven’t seen her.
Now the odds change again:
- 99% Chance You Will Never See Her Again (regardless of future text contact)
- 1% Chance Of Having Sex (sometime in the next 48 hours)
And so on.
You get the idea.
Now with most girls, of course they’re not even worth thinking about at all. So forgetting about her fast should be your default.
But if you DO ever find yourself thinking just a little too much about any one girl? Obsessing over whether or not you’ll see her again?
Instead consciously work through the odds in your head.
Distilling the situation down to pure numbers serves to remove emotion from the equation, and prepares you mentally for any specific possible upcoming rejection.
Now I’m NOT saying you should spend hours trying to figure odds, every time you think you might get rejected!
Obviously in this post I went into detail to break it down.
In life, with practice, you’ll learn to calculate odds fast – in minutes or seconds.
You can play variations of this game at any stage of any romantic relationship.
And as you get more experienced, you’ll get good at calculating odds correctly – you’ll be able to pretty accurately predict what women will do.
So play the numbers, my friend.
Because in the end?
It’s just odds.
Read More: 7 Tips For Dating Tall Women