I wrote about cutting a girl off after a second date. And in that post I mentioned my dating rules. But I didn’t describe them, and a commenter asked me to list them. So then I wrote 19 Rules For Successful First Dates. It’s pretty comprehensive. But one of those rules is so important, and I use it so often, that it deserves more attention. So today we’re gonna study it in detail.
Here’s the rule:
Cut off women who try controlling the first date venue
For example say you find a cute girl on Tinder or at a coffee shop. You get her number. And then later on you text her, ask her out for a drink at a bar near your place. She says she’s down. But she’d rather meet at a bar in her neighborhood. You make it clear you’d prefer meeting at your bar. But she refuses and insists you come to her…
There’s only one option now.
Delete her number and ghost on her.
Why take such a hard-line?
For several reasons:
You want the first date close to your place. The reason is obvious. Your main goal on first dates is getting her back to your house as fast as possible, then having sex with her that night. If you let her choose a venue close to her or ‘halfway’ between you, then you greatly reduce your chances of doing that.
Of course if you have a first date close to her place, it is possible to get laid at her house. I’ve done that before more than once. But while you can do it, it’s definitely not ideal. It’s almost always more challenging. There may be surprises and obstacles there – jealous roommates, angry dogs, protective friends, cock-blocking doormen, nosy neighbors, or even her parents.
So by going back to your place, you eliminate distracting variables. You put yourself on familiar ground. And that’s ideal for first-time sex.
2) Common Courtesy
Another reason is common courtesy. YOU took the risk, approached, and asked for her number. Then YOU initiated the texting and asked her on the first date. And YOU would likely be paying for 100% of the date. So why in the world should she be allowed to choose the date venue? How does that make any sense at all? Of course logic and reason are not female strong points. Trying to explain this to her is a waste of time, so don’t bother.
There’s a third important factor here. The old saying is true: difficult women remain difficult. By trying to wrest control from you, and change the first date place, she’s revealing her personality. She’s a difficult woman. And if she’s already acting like that then she’s likely gonna be even more difficult and controlling going forward. So even if you do bang her, which is not gonna be easy, do you really wanna pursue a woman who’s already a proven pain in the ass?
Control ties into testing sexual compliance. Because if she’s willing to do what you want, and go where you want, then she’s more likely to do other stuff with you later. So venue-changing behavior is a predictor of future sexual compliance and compliance in general. It’s a reliable gauge of how easy she’s gonna be to deal with.
5) Sets Expectations
Going to her on the first date sets a bad precedent for later on, if a relationship does develop between you. Because if you give in to her demands and travel to her? Now she knows you’re the kind of man who will cave and give her what she wants, if she asks. It starts with the first date venue. But later on she’ll expect you to fold on other things. So giving into her demands is not the ideal way to start things off!
Almost every single time I’ve made an exception, and let the woman choose the venue, it’s been a mistake. Girls aren’t stupid! They know the place you choose is likely gonna be near your house. So by trying to change it, she’s actively sabotaging your chance of success. She’s literally making it harder for the two of you to have sex! You don’t want girls who make things hard on you. In my experience, you’re better off focusing on more easy-going girls.
So how should you handle it, if you ask a new prospect out on a date, give her a specific venue, and she insists on changing it?
Like I said before – cut her off immediately.
No explaining, bargaining, pleading, anger, or trying to convince her.
Just ghost on her.
It makes no difference how desirable she is.
This is a deal breaker, my friend.
So let it go.
Now some might say this rule is too rigid.
Women who try changing first date venues are simply a huge waste of time.
So take my advice, and drop her quick if she tries doing it!
[Editor’s Note: there’s one exception – if she asks to come straight to your place instead!]
Read More: Becoming Immune To Female Tears