I spent 8 months living in Medellín, Colombia, during the last part of 2015 and the first half of 2016.
During that time, I got to know the city, and it’s people, pretty well.
Are you planning on taking a trip to Medellín?
Or maybe even moving there?
Here’s what you can expect when you visit The City of Eternal Spring…
Yeah, the women in Medellín are gorgeous. Not all of them of course. But enough that you will be surprised and pleased when you arrive. Long hair, great bodies, super-feminine. Lots of curves. Fake and real. BUT. The women are also quite insular and small-minded. They don’t have much to say about anything. They are also super-flakey. Which gets annoying.
Low Cost Of Living, High Quality Of Life
What you would consider low-cost in America or Europe buys you a nice quality of life in Medellín. For example, I had a really nice 2-bedroom, 2-bath 900-square foot high-rise apartment with doorman in El Poblado, in the ‘rich’ neighborhood. And I only paid around $900-$950 a month (depending on the exchange rate.) Food also inexpensive, though not always the best quality. Maids and personal cooks are also cheap and plentiful.
The vibe here is different than North America. In the United States, people are angry, stressed out, rushing around, obsessed with efficiency and following rules and making money. But it’s not like that in Medellín. The pace of life is slower in Colombia. People are more chill, mas tranquilo. So it’s good place to de-stress, relax, and enjoy your life.
Like I mentioned, Paisas are known for being flakey. But it’s not just the women. Paisa men are just as bad. It’s one of the main complaints that visitors have about the people here. But it’s not done out of disrespect though. People in Medellín simply have a different attitude about life and time. They don’t like to plan ahead. They do things spur-of-the-moment. Sometimes, they’ll just show up at your place, to see if you want to hang out! If you can adjust to this type of mindset you’ll understand them better, and enjoy your time here more.
Rules Can Be Bent
Rules are flexible here. People just do things. Without worrying too much about consequences. Cops will accept bribes. Or they’ll take half your stash and let you go! But at the same time, this super-chill attitude can be frustrating for people who are used to following rules. North Americans are used to getting things done, fast, the right way. But if you expect that in Medellín, you will constantly be angry and frustrated.
Not everyone is into illegal drugs of course. But for people who do use them, Medellín is a great place to be! The drugs are cheap, plentiful, and super-high quality. Cocaine, marijuana, LSD, mushrooms, hashish, all of it. And actually, some of them aren’t illegal to consume here, as long as you have small amounts for personal use. For example, having less than a gram of cocaine is not considered illegal.
Legal drugs are also plentiful and cheap. And they’re available over-the-counter at most pharmacies or drug stores. In America, they force you to go through a doctor and get a ‘prescription.’ Which is really just a scam to pull more money out of you. In Medellín, you get treated like an adult when it comes to health care. Meaning, you can self-diagnose, figure out what you need, and just go buy it. It’s much faster and cheaper that way. I’ve purchased antibiotics, allergy meds, and Modafinil. Things like testosterone and Viagra are also freely available.
The climate is amazing. It’s like springtime in Medellín every day. If you love the mountains, you’ll love the setting. Lush green Andes, set in a huge valley. Great scenery. It does get rainy and grey regularly, with frequent afternoon thunderstorms. But the rain keeps things cool, it feeds the multiple streams and rivers, and it keeps the plants green. When it doesn’t rain, it does tend to get a bit warm in afternoon. But it always cools off at night.
Domicilios (deliveries) are big part of the culture here. Basically, any store that you can think of will deliver to your house for free or for a very small fee. Just get online, order, and they bring it right to your door. Including restaurants, fast food chains, and most drug stores. Heck, even the drug dealers in Medellín will deliver! And yeah, it’s as great as it sounds, an introvert’s dream.
Spanish is a must in Medellín. Sure, you can scape by without it. But it sucks if you can’t speak Spanish here, since most locals don’t speak much English. Learning Spanish has really made my stay more enjoyable and opened up social opportunities. Basically, if you want to make friends here, and bang better quality girls, you’re gonna need to know Spanish.
But it’s not all perfect in Medellín.
There are some things I didn’t like about the city…
Medellín Is Monotone
Some say Medellín is boring and monotone. And yeah, that’s kind of true. The majority of the buildings here are made of red brick. So they all look the same. Solid, but not exciting. There is no great architecture here, to speak of.
It’s mostly safe here if you stay in the right areas. But bad things can and do happen fast. Locals and tourists get murdered. Even in the nice parts. There are dangerous people and barrios to avoid. Luckily, I stayed out of trouble. But there were a few times where my gut was warning me, sending me clear warning signals about certain people around me. The key is situational awareness, to always be aware of your surroundings. Never look or act like a victim. My rule in Medellín was this – I only left the house carrying things I was willing to give up. If someone put a gun to my head in a robbery (which happens) I would never fight back. Always give up all items fast. Your life is worth more than your stuff, things can be insured and replaced.
Hard To Make Friends
The people here are friendly but cold. If that makes sense. Meaning most will be friendly to you. But they don’t want to be your friend. However, if you stay here long enough you will probably make friends. I didn’t try to make friends when I got here. Which is probably why I made a few, eventually! But it took a while. Like six months. Once you can speak Spanish, it’s more likely you’ll have bros asking you to hang out.
It’s not just the women. The men are flakey too. It’s part of the culture. People would rather just do things spontaneously. They don’t like to plan ahead. Unlike Americans, who love planning things carefully, and then executing the plan. You also can’t really trust Paisas when it comes to business and money. It’s best to stay casual, with drinking or workout buddies. More than that is asking for trouble.
The Food Sucks
We are spoiled in North America. We grew up eating amazing food all the time. So we take it for granted. It’s not like that here. There is less variety. And what you do get is lower-quality. For example, it’s hard to find good meat and cheese in grocery stores. Not to say you can’t eat well (you can). But it’s harder to get and you’re gonna pay more for quality. You gonna go through many bad restaurants before finding the good ones.
There is not a whole lot of culture here. No great museums or amazing history. No famous landmarks. And though the culture here is Latin, it’s sort of bland. Americans are used to Mexican culture, which is distinct and loud and colorful. Colombia doesn’t have that. It’s funny, in Colombia, they actually look to Mexico for a lot of their culture and entertainment.
For some people, Medellin is over-rated. But for others, it may be a perfect place to live! It comes down to YOUR expectations. If you come to Medellín expecting it to be like America or Mexico, you may hate it. But if you’re willing to accept the culture and people for what they are? You might just fall in love with Medellín…